God was a flip-flopper in Glendale, Arizona on Saturday night.
January 17, 2016
As an old white Christian male living out the last 20 or so years of his life, (who served as an altar boy, choir member
and deacon in his church for well over 40 years), I was really confused as to which side God was pulling for on Saturday night
during the football game between the Arizona Cardinals and the Green Bay Packers.
I know God pulls for one team over another in sports because all these ego-driven, attention-seeking, point-to-the-heavens-after-a-good-play-only;
players tell me and show me so. They show me God is on their side when they throw or catch a touchdown pass. They NEVER
point to the heavens when they throw an interception or drop a pass. Perhaps he did, but in his limited playing days, I never
saw Tim Tebow do his Tebow-ing prayer after he threw in incomplete pass or an interception.
Baseball players show me God is on their side after a batter hits a home run, or a pitcher strikes out a batter with the
bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth inning, or any time in between. May they both rest in peace, but I never saw a picture
of Donnie Moore pointing to the heavens thanking God after Dave Henderson hit that home run off of him in the 1986 baseball
Even if it was fashionable during the playing days of Gordie Howe and Rocket Richard, I doubt very many hockey players
would have performed this public religious blessing. They knew if they did, they would be eating elbow sandwiches the rest
of the game and the rest of their careers. I do not know if Lou Fontinato is a religious man, but a picture showing the shape
of his broken nose on his face after his Gordie Howe fight would be perfect for the after photo on a before and after poster.
God must have really been confused on Saturday night. Initially, He was pulling for Arizona because He allowed an Arizona
player to catch that tipped pass in the end zone. Then God was for Green Bay because He allowed Green Bay to intercept a
sure touchdown pass in the back of the end zone. God was still pulling for Green Bay when He allowed Aaron Rodgers to throw
another "Hail Mail" touchdown this season at the end of regulation. However, God quickly switched sides because
everyone knows God only allows one "Hail Mary" touchdown pass per season per quarterback. During the coin flip,
God prevented the coin from flipping during the first coin flip and had the referee flip the coin again. The second flip
favored the Cardinals. God stayed consistent in overtime because He allowed Larry Fitzgerald to have a long gain after catching
a pass. Then God allowed Larry Fitzgerald to score on that shovel pass.
Man, God was very busy with sports on Saturday night. He had to stay up to nearly midnight in the eastern-time-zone to
make sure the correct team won the game. Given that Sunday is God's day of rest, I wonder what teams He pre-ordained to win.
Maybe God will sit out these games. After all, He was quite busy on Wednesday night picking out those three groups that
had the correct Power ball numbers.